This morning, instead of church, I took my coffee and biscuit outside in the cool breeze and thought of the missing Daddies - the ones called, now, to heaven. It wasn't a sad meditation - I don't really believe in death. The shock of losing loved ones is catastrophic, yes, but the tragedy is always about the people left behind. What is to become of them? How will we cope?
In the silence of this beautiful morning, I thought of Wayne (one of the most spirited, glad to be, fathers in the world) and of Doc, Greg Levenduski, in my book first runner up in the daddy department! They were good friends in life. In heaven, they looked down into my garden just now and smiled at me.
I picked a rose for them and put it in a little vase beside my newspaper.
The morning was quiet - no plans - those other two fabulous daddies gone camping with a couple of lucky twins! I thought about Art and Corey and all the love and care they give us. I remembered the late-night text message. "Miss You." How lucky am I that I could sit in this spot and smile at the thought of all the boating, fishing, swimming, and feasting that must be going on in the woods this weekend?
Meanwhile, the sun was shining in the privacy that I've tried so hard to nurture here in the garden. The blue jays came out of the trees and sat on the fence but were silent for the most part, letting the cardinal couples from the rose bushes out front (who perched themselves on the chain that holds the stag-horn) carry the melody.
The wrens sat close to me, on the table, and chirped some sort of chorus. I could see the crow in his perch by the lake on top of the tallest pine and, mercifully, he stayed in his place for once. All-in-all it was quite a hymn they were singing.
I recited my prayer/mantra with its revised beginning - the only thing I carried away from The Shepherd Psalm by William Evans.
"The LORD is my Shepherd, I shall not go missing." Even alone in my garden, I am not alone in my garden.
I sipped my coffee. I shared my biscuit with Squirrel and the sausage with Belle. I flipped the newspaper, scanning. I listened to my morning prayers. Here are several of them:
Now I've come in to start the computer up and tell you all of this. Morning has flown. Have a wonderful afternoon. Post your adventures on facebook! Have great times with your children and grandchildren! That's what I love about each one of you - your fantastic ability to have fun and to carry on the great legacy left behind by the ones who have gone from us....
